I prefer to think of it as boredom, mainly because ever since I gave back Call Of Duty World At War back I've had nothing to look forward to turning my PS3 on anymore....NO MORE NAZI ZOMBIES T_T stupid nephew he sucks at the game and yet he wants to play it -__- but whatever it's his game so I just have to wait till my copy of the game gets delivered here :( when I had that game I had something to distract me, to entertain me for hours, it was the only time chaos and mayhem in the form of a massacre of German Nazi Undead was available for me to vent frustration or to just to have some pointless fun. But I managed before I had Nazi Zombies and I was happy but I don't know what I used to do to have fun, mostly anything I try now is boring me instantly. So than there's the other side, am I lonely??
I dunno really, I don't hate being single, it honestly is hassle free but than again I do miss knowing that there's someone out there caring for me and who thinks about me day in and day out. Despite that I don't really think I could find a relationship now, nearly all girls are stupid, ignorant, dumb, blonde, or too thickheaded for them to just be mature. Immaturity I can handle if it's absent, if there's enough incentive for me to continue the relationship, but dishonesty is the main thing I can't handle now, it's just not something I can handle, I'm a truth person, hate lies. I'm pretty sure I'll be able to manage single, but I never look at it as single, I look at it as 'open' to everyone haha =P less ropes the better but lately haven't been exploiting that luxury mainly because of HSC :( stupid school always brings me down. Besides if I was to get into a relationship couldn't be with just anyone, got someone in mind but it's not gonna happen because too much troubles associated with the thought of it so have to avoid my hearts desire and think this one out, if I can't get this emptiness out than OK i'll give it a shot but until than not gonna ruin things or start dramaz...
However right at this moment I'm kinda calm, just bored like epicly bored to the point I'm walking around my room staring at the ceiling trying to get headspins =P which has caused me to be at a mental stalemate, I'm not depressed but I'm not happy either. Not satisfied but not dissatisfied as well. Well I needa figure myself out in the following week, plus side I have something to look forward to...I BREAK MY 4 MONTH ABSTINENCE OF GREEN =D
Haha hopefully this week I won't be sober and be able to toke up again =)
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